You Can Lead A Horse To Water……
You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him drink. This phrase is normally said when you give a person advice and they don’t adhere to it. I want to take a moment to really discuss this thought process of why people do what they do. I often talk about how important it is to monitor what you allow to enter your mind. What I mean by that is for example, you’re in your feelings and because you’re in your feelings you turn to your play list. All of the songs that you choose to listen to are all sad and depressing songs, thus you sink deeper into your feelings. You began to think that the song is meant just for you!
You then pattern your day from a place of sorrow and then you repeat the process. Now me being the type of person that I am, I always try to uplift and will try to get you to see the positive in any situation. I began though to get frustrated when I would encounter people who were just bent on finding the problem for every solution. They can find the little thing to be upset about. In order to preserve my peace, I had to really get the understanding that people view the world as they are inside! Understanding this will adjust how you deal with people. We want people to change, but people don’t change unless they change from the inside out. There are no shortcuts, you can change for a week, and maybe a couple of weeks but you will always resort back to what you feel inside.
There are people who are struggling, yet they put on a front like they are all good. They will boast about their accomplishments, boast about the new car, promotions, etc. but they display the worst behavioral traits. They are rude, mean especially to the people they love but they will put on the mask for the people who can careless about them because they want to paint a perfect picture. These are the types of people who really are the weakest inside, those are people who struggle with self-worth and because they struggle they tend to pick apart everyone else. What they are basically doing is spewing the issues they have within themselves out to others.
Let me make this personal. I went through a phase where I felt like I had no support. I felt like the people closest to me would rather support any and everyone else just not me. I felt like I wasn’t appreciated, I felt like everything I did went unnoticed. I felt like this for some time and one day, I a complete stranger and I had a conversation. We began to talk and after the conversation they thanked me and told me I am going to do great things. I felt amazing, then I told that story and I didn’t get the response I thought I should have and crushed I was again.
The strangest thing happened though, at that moment I began to look deep inside and I began to realize that I was going through this not just because of what I felt was being done to me, but it was because what I was doing to myself. I didn’t think I was good enough for certain things, I had insecurities about myself that changed the way I viewed the world. I was seeing the world through a broken lens thus the things that happened to me always seemed like I was being dealt a bad hand. I began to understand that I had to change the inner me in order to change how I did life.
I began to give myself props; I began to acknowledge that I was good at what I do. I began to appreciate that I can talk to anyone about anything. I began to give myself props how because I was able to relate to any and every one my kids even benefited with their teachers. My son could talk to me and I could help him simply with words. As I began to shift my inner self, the outside world seemed to change. I didn’t need a pat on the back from people; I began to be my biggest fan. I found peace and I couldn’t have found it until I changed the inner me.
The moral to this story is in order for REAL change you have to start within. You have to understand that some people won’t change simple because of how they view themselves. How people do life is directly tied to how they feel inside. How people treat other people is tied to how they feel about themselves. Think I am lying, go to someone’s page who you know has issues and scroll through their timeline and tell me you can’t feel what I am saying.
About The Author
I am what I am, It is what it is!
…thoughts, motivation, and advice of R.Karo